Thursday, 1 December 2016

Zombicide - "A Twilight World"

Zombicide - "A Twilight World"
The Concluding Part 2

They called him “Mr Honk” at The Falkhurst psychiatric hospital where he permanently resided. He frequently escaped, where he could usually be found hanging about public places, entertaining people with his `funnies` making balloon animals for the children, and generally entertaining folks with his free impromptu shows... until the nurses would come, of course, and cart him right on back to the padded ward. These breaks for freedom usually heralded a short but violent outbreak, during which times he would have to be sedated while the fits slowly wore themselves out.. and eventually subsided into a calm, chin dribbling catatonia.
When Mr Honk escaped during the week end sales and made his way to The Mall: unfortunately, this coincided precisely with the sudden virulent outbreak of the zombie virus... and this time no orderlies came to bring him `home` to his nice safe, soft, padded cell; and the clown was left to wander among the shopping aisles totally unmolested. He ate ice cream, and candy, and boiled sweeties, and all manner of things he would normally have been forbidden to eat (the sugar tended to send him hyper). But Mr Honk wasn`t stupid. He may have been a lunatic, but he sure wasn`t as slow as many quite wrongly assumed. He twigged the fact that the `outbreak` was happening before anyone else even began seriously to respond to it. Holing up in a warehouse... full of cotton candy, he settled down to a good tucker munch of yummy goodness: all washed down by copious quantities of fizzy Coke.
He had found the keys to The Mall (quite by chance) when he had hit the security guard over the head with a fire axe. `Man that guy`s head came apart!` He recalled. But yeah, that guard had a huge bunch of keys on him, and Mr Honk had used them to go round systematically opening doors and searching for even more lovely candy. Unfortunately, he didn’t really grasp the concept of closing the doors after himself, and this had allowed many of the roaming infected access to fresh areas of The Mall.
Mr Honk had discovered (maybe because his clothing was splattered in zombie gunk) that if he stood still, the dead `ums tended to leave him alone. Thus is was that he had first encountered Dakota! He spotted immediately, by her attire, that she was an inmate at the penitentiary. But he said nothing about that. He was good at keeping secrets. He had simply smiled... and just knew what he had to do. She was a whore! He could smell it off her. Her large semi bare breasts were witness to the fact she was a harlot, an adulterous, and one of the fallen angels of Satan. He would soon send her into the light, and burn away the evil pollution residing in her heart. In fact he would cut that out and write his usual cryptic message with the blood. They had never caught him. They were not even aware of the serial of killings perpetuated in the area this last couple of years. 
It was all a sign from God. If God hadn`t wanted him to do it, he wouldn’t have let the vigilant administrations of his servant remain undetected, would he?  Mr Honk the Clown had learned to be ever-so-efficient in what he did.
“Be careful opening that door.” He called out softly to the whore. “There are dogs on the other side. Only, they aren`t right, see. They seem to be affected like the rest!”
Dakota opened the door quietly...slowly, just a crack. Sure enough there they were. The smell assailed her nose immediately.. uugh, dead! They were frickin` dead - just like those walking fucking shoppers. But the dogs were at the far end of a back yard among the trash. They seemed to be worrying over something.... a dead body? Looking ahead and to the right a bit, Dakota saw their chance.

There was a gate which, presumably, would lead out to the street, and to other stores on the far side of the road. “Let’s do this, and quietly.” She whispered over her shoulder to the clown, who was smiling at her as she did so.

They were half way to the gate when the first hound turned its ugly dead head and stared at them both with empty white hungry eyes. Pulling back its nasty looking lips, it showed teeth, and blood and gore and flesh, hanging in torn fleshy strips from its mouth. Two other dogs turned to stare after the first.

“Run!” Dakota yelled. And the two of them sprinted across the yard to the gate, now a mere few meters away.
Praying it was not padlocked, Dakota breathed a silent prayer, when she discovered the lock had already been forced and was lying in a heap of chain at the foot of the gate. Flinging the wooden gate open, the two of them rushed out.... pulling it firmly shut behind them. Just as the dog pack reached the other side and threw themselves against it with a crescendo of sound.
They were suddenly back out on the street... right at the back of The Mall. The dead were everywhere... walking, shuffling, stumbling: aimlessly and without purpose. Dakota realised with the commotion from the dogs, and the woman and the clown`s sudden alarming appearance practically amidst the cadavers... it was only a matter of moments before they were spotted.
Making a quick, silent `follow me` gesture with her hand, Dakota proceeded to cross the road... with almost nonchalantly slow regular movements, yet stiff and pained; trying not to draw any attention.
Dakota jumped. Behind her came a loud HONK... HONK... as the clown let loose an ill timed funny. Every single zombie, as one, turned and looked at them with their milk white eyes, then started to shamble purposefully towards them. One of the dead actually began to run.
“Move it!” Dakota screamed. And ran full pelt for the nearest door.
Behind her, the clown gave a vicious leer: and lifting his machete high over his head, he chopped downwards, behind the woman`s back. The zombie which has been about to lunge at her neck, fell like a stone, bought down in a spout of deep crimson. There was a Crash!! As Dakota hit the lock on the door, it yielded under her assault and suddenly they were in off the street.. and out of immediate danger. Mr Honk slammed the door shut behind them, giggling heartily too himself. Already Dakota was scanning the darkness for any sign of movement. All seemed still.
She swung on her heel to the clown. “What the holy crap do you think you were doing just now?”
The Man shrugged. “I don’t know.” He giggled. “It just seemed the right thing to do at the time.”
“Pull another stupid stunt like that, and you`re on your own, get it?” Actually, Dakota was already silently deciding to ditch this weird bozo the second she got a chance. Why did she need his God damn bloody Mall keys anyway?
Mr Honk just giggled and thrust a bar of candy clumsily into his mouth, as he looked at her in silence.
{{Using a search action, she checked the Red Token in the building... its reverse side was also red, so a new survivor was not found. However, she used two search tokens and found 10 points worth of food and water... that’s 10 of the 20 points of sustenance each and every adult survivor needs to scavenge, and survive one week in my world}}.
“Pull another stupid stunt like that, and you`re on your own, get it?”
{{The token is red on the reverse side. Not the hoped for Blue.  Damn, so no new survivor. But this did give her breathing space and allowed her to search for food and drink.}}
The commotion at the front of the store was getting serious, and judging by the splintering of wood, the doors there would not hold much longer. It was now or never. The good news was that the noise at the front had pulled most the walkers away from the sides of the building, leaving a relatively clear path for the pair to make good their escape.
Slipping out the small side door, Dakota and Mr Honk sprinted along the road and away from immediate danger.

They chopped down a lone walker as they run past the foul cadaver.
The Clown saw his moment and started to raise his blade to deliver the holy gift of pain to this terrible fallen hussy of a woman. But Dakota had spent too much of her life around extreme danger.. too long used to this sort of crap, to miss the immediate warning signs. She swung round, raised both barrels... and fired. The clown howled in agony and went down in a mass of his own, thick, crimson pumping gore.
But somehow he managed to find his feet again, and turned and ran howling along the road.. back the way they had both just come. By the time Dakota was reloaded. The clown was out of sight. Just a red pool of blood remained on the ground, where Jack and Jill had left their tell tale mark on the dreadful creature that was Mr Honk.
Turning with a satisfied smile, she blew on the barrels of her still smoking guns, and sauntered away (off the board) to safety.
Way off behind her, something big roared in hungry rage.
Dakota ran and she ran, along the road and away from The Mall. Eventually she came to an intersection, and then a crossroads. She thought how pretty that flock of gulls and crows looked: the contrast between the black and the white! Until she realised the smell coming off them: and saw the tattered feathers and the rags of decaying flesh hanging off their raggedy wings. They seemed too busy, too intent eating some fresh road kill to notice the woman. And Dakota backed away slowly, hoping against hope they didn’t stop what they were doing... or look up and notice her!


Mr Honk was in such pain, but he was slowly slipping out of consciousness as his life`s blood pulsed steadily away onto the ground. Eventually he slumped onto the floor and knew no more.


Soon afterwards, he would join his new brothers and sisters on the street and began to shamble and stumble his way along the road with them.
But suddenly he caught the scent of a woman, a woman he very much wanted to hurt, to kill and to eat. It felt the right thing to do. Without warning, the thing that has been Mr Honk, started to run. It had her scent, and the rest of the herd followed after.
Amidst the steadily growing crowd... an abomination roared. The sound was picked up by the second cry of a brand new abomination: while the moans of the dead formed a deep, morose, choral support.
The End
Article By Steve








  1. You cant even begin to know the satisfaction I got from unloading both barrels into that bloody clown. But you are aren`t you - I just know it.. he`s now going to chase me for ever isn't he. A reoccurring enemy, just when I most don't want it to appear lol.

    Oh nooo!!! Next part is going to be called "The Birds" isn't it, I just know it *groans* hehehe.

    Was a great game to be a part of, and played out really well; like a zombie role play game almost. Amazing what a few additional rules can add to the Zombicide experience.

    1. way to go Hil. If you hadn`t done it, I sure as hell would have.

      Stevie, nice - nice story. Making a story from a game isn`t always easy (which is odd, as you`d think the games we play might lend themselves to it - but actually often don't). However, the key is to change a game to MAKE it worthy of being turned into a story, not the other way round. Loved it, and now its made me want to carry on creating my clix carnival terrain, replete with creepy music and.. lots of clowns and stuff, obviously.

  2. You should have seen your face when you proudly spun on your heels and gave Honk both barrels of Jack and Jill. The whoop of excited joy when he went down like a brick... the look of sheer panic on your face when he started to get up again. The panicked tone in your voice when you realised you were unloaded and frantically popped fresh shells into your weapons.... looked up, only to find he was gone!

    hehe. Yes maybe we will revisit this one again one day ^^.

  3. Excellent! Both barrels into that nasty, nasty clown! Told you all evil the lot of them!!!!!

    Great finish, I love the gulls version of the flock of crowz. Just enjoyable guys, really really enjoyable to read

    1. funny story there. When we went to paint the crows we ran out of black undercoat half way through. Damn we though, until we remembered Alfred Hitcock`s "The Birds" which we had just watched the night before. Easy-peasy really: we just pulled out the white undercoat spray (we had half a can of that left) and turned half the flocks into gulls. Worked a treat.

  4. Speaking on behalf of S.O.C.K. (Society of Clown, I find depictions in the media such as this to be a disgrace. It is our inalienable right to terrify small children, unsettle adults and occasionally slice up wanton hussys. We have our eye on you - expect to find a balloon animal on your pillow very soon. Remember, "they all float down here..."

    1. S.O.C.K. sound pretty darn scary in their own right. I have this image of a bare room... a captured clown tied to a chair having his toe nails removed one at a time: bright angle poise light shone into his eyes the whole time... with this burly guy in a flower power t-shirt shouting into his face "Try making a funny now, Mr Bozo."

    2. Slight misunderstanding there, Steve. SOCK is the Clowns - it was supposed to be 'Killer Clowns', but that would be SOKC, which isn't as funny...and Clowns are all about the funny. You're thinking of LACK - the League Against Costumed Killers. Every wondered why we don't see Ronald McDonald anymore? Now you know...

    3. LACK - the League Against Costumed Killers.

      I absolutely LOVE it. Right, that's going in my game - officially STOLEN!!

      STAMP!!!! <--- of approval.

    4. That's it, I`m starting on converting a Ronald mini later this week. It just has to be, its now written.

  5. heheheheehheeheheheee

    "They ALL float down here.. and when you`re down here with us.. YOU`LL FLOAT TOOOOOOO""

  6. just out of interest, anyone thinking how these birds might make great additions to their own games. The set comes with 15 stands, each stand containing about seven birds. That's a lot of bird miniatures, and makes it pretty cost efficient.


    Haven't seen the Black Plague set but I assume it contains a similar number od stands.

    Black Plague:

  7. Great ending to a very enjoyable batrep. I still don't know why Dakota didn't shoot Honk as soon as she met him. I would have! That said, Honk makes a great villain, whether he be human or undead. Sunny is looking to recruit him right now!

  8. {{Sunny is looking to recruit him right now!}}

    HHAAHAHahahahaaa woohoooo!!!!!

    Glad you liked it. Loads of scope to keep going, but there`s time to pick up from where we left off... another time. So many of those zombicide characters are just screaming out to be `bought to life` with stories. Would be nice to think of each one being covered in some way as time goes on. Though, I am seriously thinking of repainting the lot *gulp* yep... my weird World War II zombie thing is nearly ready to go, and all the zombicide crowd repainted for that (and remodelled where necessary) would look pretty darn hot I think.

  9. As a paid up member of LACK I strongly advise against the "Pennywise" quotes!

    Evil, red nose wearing, shoes too big for their evil little feet, frizzy orange haired Devils will get what's coming to them. I also endorse "People United (for) Naughty Clown Hunting" or PUNCH

  10. {{As a paid up member of LACK I strongly advise against the "Pennywise" quotes!}}

    But we`re all just `clowning` around` hahahahahaa

    Still better not act the `clown` ^^

  11. I hope not to see a clown in nightmare after reading this brillant - bloody - but brilliant AAR...epic, love your style Stephen...But I will not go to bed immediately afterwards, too afraid of nightmares...Excellent!

  12. hahahaa, hi Phil, and thanks for your comment. Sorry I scared you hehehe. Clowns are really scary at the best of times aren't they... but give them a slight twist, and they become ten times more so *grins*